In the name of God – Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.
Amen.
“Oh
God! Where is God?” That’s probably not what Mary and Joseph said when they
realized that their twelve year old son was missing, but this interesting story
from Luke poses that question to us – Where is God? This story is found only in
Luke, and everyone can find something that they relate to. Parents know that
gut wrenching horror of worrying about your child, and then the joy of knowing
they are okay. Children appreciate seeing a child hold his own against the
expert adults. And teenagers love to have an image of Jesus that is all about resisting
authority. But more than resonating with our life experiences, this story of a
twelve year old Jesus has something to say about what it means to follow him.
This
story shows us the importance of continuing faith formation. Consider what the
Holy Family does in this story – they made the hundred mile trek from Nazareth
to Jerusalem for Passover, and the text tells us that this was not uncommon for
them to be doing. They had been making this trip for over a decade now, and so
it wasn’t odd that Jesus was walking with some of his friends along the
journey. After all, they all knew the way and were traveling as a group. This
family prioritized the practicing of their faith, and so it’s not completely
surprising that Jesus was in the Temple, as the family had taught him that was
a good place to be.
You
don’t have to look very hard these days to find polls or newspaper articles
that speak about a perceived decline in religiosity, especially among younger
generations. And it’s true. In the church, someone who was labeled as a “regular”
would be expected to be in church 3 or 4 Sundays a month. Today, a “regular”
attendee now means someone who comes twice a month. And it isn’t just St. Luke’s,
around the country and across denominations, levels of religiosity are
changing. Now, some may say “not every denomination is declining in numbers,”
and that’s true. But there is a huge difference between religious affiliation
and discipleship. St. Luke’s can boast of membership of over 600, but on the average
Sunday we have 160 in the pews.
And
the formula really isn’t complicated – input in equal output out. A couple of
years ago, there was a great article written by a “soccer mom” called “Sports
vs. Church.” She tells the story of sitting at a Sunday youth sporting event
feeling very conflicted. While sitting in the bleachers, she counted many other
families that attended their church, realizing that this soccer game was
competing with the vitality of their church. She writes “I was conflicted as I
reflected on how I got into this situation. My husband and I know the value of church
family. We know that consistency is very important for children to build
relationships with their church family and grow as disciples of Christ.”
But
she also notes that she felt as if she had no choice but to be at this
particular tournament. If her children weren’t there, the team would not have
had enough players, and they would be disappointing all of those other
families. She is right to acknowledge that one missed Sunday isn’t going to
derail her children’s faith, though she writes that “we quickly find that one Sunday missed has become many Sundays
missed, and before long church has ceased to be a habit and is reduced to
something we do when we don’t have anything else to do on Sunday mornings.”
Let me read this particularly poignant paragraph: “When we say
“yes” to one thing, we are saying “no” to something else. I have seen it too
easily happen that without meaning to reject church, families are saying “yes”
to extracurricular activities – but this “yes” is also a “no” to consistency at
church activities and developing relationships with our church family. I
have spoken to so many parents who spend years on the field, at the pool, on
the ski slopes, in the gym, or in the studio and when they get to the other
side of these years have deep regrets. Their children don’t want to go to church,
they don’t have relationships with peers or leaders who know and love Jesus,
and they have not developed the discipline of making church a priority. These
parents who now have grown children have expressed that they would do it
different if they could go back and do it again. I have had several parents
with grown children express that it was not worth it. They did not carefully
guard their priorities and allowed other commitments to push out what was most
important. They can look back and see that the time spent on other activities
directly affected their children’s relationship with church and this directly
affected their relationship with God.”
Church attendance is not the goal, nor were Passover celebrations
to Mary and Joseph, but it was what stands behind the attendance that matters:
relationship, rituals that give meaning, and learning about God. This mother,
in reaching her conclusion, writes “Can we step back a bit and think
about the adults that we are raising? What if our children get to their early
20’s and have little to no relationship with God or other disciples of Jesus?
Will we look back and say, ‘Well, at least they made it to the championships!’?”
While I can’t promise
that rituals will make everyone a devout believer, I can say that if we hope
for children to think that faith is important, we have to treat it that way. This
isn’t about guilt, or shame, or giving you more obligations to stress about. I’m
not trying to make anyone feel bad, nor am I passing judgment on the way you
structure your family lives. That’s not my job. What I’m hoping to do though is
to hold up a mirror to our society and suggest that there is different way
forward.
The recipe really is as
simple as input in equal output out. And it isn’t only Sunday morning, nor is
it only a problem with sports. Furthermore, this is about all of us – those of
us with children and those without, for grandparents and godparents. When a
child is Baptized in this church, we all promise to do all in our power support
these children in their life in Christ.
If we hope that faith
will be a part of our children’s lives, it must be a part of their upbringing.
If we hope that St. Luke’s is robust in the future, we must pass along a robust
faith to the children of his parish. If the input is that church attendance is
occasional, family prayer time is rare, and the same handful of church members
work with Children’s Chapel or Youth Group, we really shouldn’t be surprised
when the output is declining religiosity. Unintentionally, are we teaching our
children that coming to church isn’t important, or that their congregation
really doesn’t value them? Not for one second do I think we mean to send these
messages, but I think the verdict is already in. We now have the results of
what happens when you raise a generation of children with competing priorities –
and the result isn’t very good when it comes to faith formation.
It’s been a slow decline,
for sure. It used to be that faith was taught at home and supported by the
church. But then parents got busy and families changed. No longer could we
assume that a parent would be at home to raise children. And so, the Sunday
School movement began decades ago to try to address this issue. But times have
again changed, Sunday morning has really become the only time that families
have to themselves – to even spend time with each other.
I get it, I’m a parent, I
know it’s not easy to get kids out the door; I know it’s not easy to sit in the
pews with a toddler and be worshipful; I know how valuable a morning to sleep
in and take things slow is. What has happened in this process though is this –
faith formation used to happen at home, and that worked because parents and
children had time together at home. Then home life got busier, so formation
shifted to Sunday mornings, and that worked because nothing competed with
Sunday mornings. But now Sunday mornings aren’t synonymous with going to
church, and so robust faith formation isn’t happening. Mary and Joseph had it
right, faith formation starts at home and is supported by the religious institution.
We need to take seriously the task of reading Scripture at home, of praying at
home, of making church attendance the rule, not the exception. Helping members
of St. Luke’s to go deeper in their faith is one of my major priorities in the
coming year, and beyond; so please, let me know what you need to go deeper in
your faith journey at home.
And notice what happens
to the young Jesus in the Temple. He was sitting in the Temple with the elders,
listening and asking questions. What if those in the Temple had been too busy
to sit with this inquisitive child? What if they said, “Sorry, we don’t have
much of a Sunday School program”? When I was hired as the Assistant Rector at
St. Francis in Greensboro, my primary job responsibility was to be the youth
minister. Growing up, the churches that I attended really didn’t have functioning
youth groups, so I didn’t have any experience to go on. That didn’t stop them
from hiring me, I was a 26 year old priest, of course I must be good with
youth. I didn’t feel a particular passion to work with youth, nor did I think that
I had a great skillset for doing youth ministry. So I get that not everyone
feels qualified to work with children or youth, I really do. God doesn’t always
call the qualified, but always qualifies the called. And you know what, those
kids didn’t care that I wasn’t a dynamic youth group guru. They wanted someone
who valued them, who respected them, who taught them about Jesus. And that is something
that all of us can do. This is your invitation to get involved, and I look forward
to your call or email this week so we can talk more about how you can be
involved.
One of the issues that I
most often hear, both from parents and potential teachers, is that they don’t
feel qualified to teach the faith to children and youth. And that’s the church’s
fault, and I’m truly sorry for that. We haven’t been equipping people to do
this. Studies show that the “average” Christian has a rather low level of
Biblical literacy. And we all know that children come up with some of the
deepest and most probing questions out there. So if we don’t know the story of
the Bible, how can we teach it to children? Let me know what help you need.
It is our task to also
take seriously our own ongoing formation as disciples. At a previous church, an
adult said one of the most jarring things that I’ve ever heard when he was
asked why he didn’t attend adult formation classes. He said “I did catechism
classes when I was a kid and got Confirmed, so there isn’t anything more that I
need to learn.” It really is idolatrous to stop doing faith formation, to stop
learning about God. To not engage our faith is to either say “I know enough
about God” or it is to say “I’m going to put other things before God,” both of
which are idolatry. This story is a call to spend more time in study, more time
in prayer, more time reading the Bible. There are a lot facets to my job as a
priest that I love, and one of my favorites to meet with you all to talk with
you about your questions. I’m never too busy to schedule a time to talk about
faith with you.
“Where is God?” is the
question that this sermon began with. Jesus says “why were you surprised to
find me in my Father’s house?” We might interpret this as “Why are we surprised
to find God in Church?” God is always with us, waiting to be known more fully,
loved more deeply, and followed more closely. This story about the twelve year
old Jesus in the Temple shows us the importance of having regular and consistent
practices of faith in our families, it shows us the importance of having a
church community that is committed to supporting children and youth in the
faith, and it shows us the importance of continually growing in our faith.
Heavenly Father, during
Christmas we remember that you sent your own Son into this world. We thank you
for the children of this parish, who are entrusted to our care. Help us to
nurture them in faith, that they may come to know you, to love you, and to
serve you. Guide us deeper in our devotion to you. And grant us the will to put
faith first in our homes and in our lives. All this we ask for the sake of your
dear Son, Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
